The ImPerfect Perfectionist

Everyone over here asked .. if I wanna go home to visit.. ??  i think it is such a stupid question..!! OF COURSE i wanna go home for a visit..!!  But who is gonna take care of the business.. and the more than 10K we have to spend.. if we all go home together.  I know they don’t mean no home.. but asking stuff like that just makes me boil..!! and wanna scream.. and tell them.. OF COURSE I WANNA GO HOME.

The man started helping out .. with cleaning. .and housework.. without asking, kinda surprising eh..?? it is!!  Wonder if he was reading my rant here.. .muahahah!! won’t be surprised if he did.  You know at home i can certainly hire a maid to help.. but would i feel safe to leave the maid with my kid and the man..??  We hear so many horror stories about these maid trying to get into the master’s pants..and take over.. and mistreating the kids.. so better be safe than sorry.

We were out at the in-laws.. and had gone out early.. so the plan was to come home early.  At 4 something.. i had asked the man.. whether he wanted to go home for dinner.. or eat at his parents.  He had confirmed that we are making baked chicken.. and the moment .. the in law called out to say that dinner was ready.. he forgot everything . .and ate there.  What the hell was he thinking..??

Yes.. one has gotta be groaning in pain . .before you can get the man to help.  He wouldn’t know to help.. because he just isn’t sensitive enough . .to know that you are in so much pain.  I have to tell him everytime.. and tell him what i expect him to clean up.  In fact, if you do not give proper instruction.. he would not clean everything.. just the ones you tell him.  Last nite .. he left the slow cooker unwashed.  But of course.. what do you expect..! he is a MAN afterall..!!!

The outlaws couldn’t come to babysit .. because she was needs to prepare to go to the city 3 days later. She is going for a show .. in the city.. with some friends.. and she need 2 days for preparation. Holy Moly..!!! But the man bumped into her .. at the grocery store .. yesterday morning.. although she had said.. she wasn’t going to stay in town. Can’t really depend on the outlaws to help out i guess. Wonder how she thinks i can go for an opp just anytime.. when no help can be expected of her.

Sometimes, I think i have too much hope.  When i told the man to do the pots and pans.. because my tummy was acting up.. he did all the pots and pans. .and left the kid’s bottles unwashed.  The morning came. .and it still wasn’t washed.  So with pain . .even in the morning.. i had to stand and do those bottles.. and dishes for the morning.  JOY..!

So what if my kid speaks more like me.. than her father..?? does it mean.. that it is not any better..?? that was what the man’s father said to me.. today.. in a joking manner of course..! but so offensive you know..! like my speech ain’t good enough.. for my daughter..?? well.. if they want her to speak more like them.. they should spend more time with them.  Angry you know..!

Going out to eat with the man can be very stressful.. because he is kinda a grouch.  Are all men this way..?? I find that i’m in a huge hurry to finish my food.. i wonder why..?? is it really because of the man.. or because of my online work..?? or is it because of my fibroids.. and uncomfy disposition. Or is it the price i was worried of paying.. for food not worth it?  i can’t help but wonder why eating out is not a joyful even for me no more.

The man’s father seems to wanna go on and on.. about me being fat. He even joked that the ice i am crunching on.. must have calories.. and i knew exactly what he meant. But i refused to explain once again.. that it is the fibroids.. that is making me look and feel fat.. so i just let it go.. and agreed with him. Sometimes I really feel like screaming at him.. and tell him.. that because of the business.. i had not done my paperwork properly..coz’ any paperwork for immigration cost money.. and we didn’t have alot then… therefore the dealy in getting those fibroids out. Inconsiderate to say the least.. but i could have snapped back if i wanted to.